Saturday, June 4, 2011

Brother Lawrence


I've found that I read The Practice of the Presence of God much like I read C.S. Lewis books. I find my brain wandering again and again, and over and over again I must read and re-read what seems like the same sentence until finally, I think I am grasping the point. Ug. It's difficult work. But I've found it well worth it and rewarding. I like that my brain has to think harder. I like that I'm not being told exactly what it means apart from the few sentences at the beginning of each conversation or letter. It means that I must seek God and connect with Him to decipher the message He has in it for me. Almost each paragraph begins with "That…" which threw me off at first. But after awhile I went back and chose sentences that stood out to me from the second conversation and jotted down my thoughts on them.

"That he had always been governed by love, without selfish views; and that having resolved to make the love of GOD the end of all his actions.."

This statement reminds and challenges me to drop all (absolutely all) prejudices, judgments and preconceived notions about people and to simply LOVE first and foremost. Leaving all else behind. Leaving my own thoughts aside. It's way too easy to judge people upon first glance. This is another reminder to me to pray for God's help in showing His PERFECT love to people. Not my fake love, albeit sometimes well intentioned. Other times I must admit, not well intentioned at all.

"So, likewise, in his business in the kitchen (to which he had naturally a great aversion), having accustomed himself to do everything there for the love of GOD, and with prayer, upon all occasions, for His grace to do his work well, he had found everything easy, during the fifteen years that he had been employed there."

That which I absolutely LOVE to do, I get to call my job. To be creative, and design, and use the gifts God has given me AND get paid to do it, is an incredible blessing! There are times however, I find myself complaining at parts of my job that aren't as pleasant. Don't we all? This is a true wake up call for me. If a person can remain at peace and actually call a job they abhore "easy" then what place do I have complaining about parts of my job that are unpleasant when I LOVE what I do?

"That he expected after the pleasant days GOD had given him, he should have his turn of pain and suffering; but that he was not uneasy about it, knowing very well, that as he could do nothing of himself; GOD would not fail to give him the strength to bear them."

A couple things come to mind when I read this.

The first: I don't know why, but when good things happen in my life, somewhere in the back of my mind my brain thinks exactly like this. "Good is happening now, but pain is to come later." Whether or not that will be true at some point or not, I don't believe this thought comes from God. Furthermore, I believe it pains Him when I cannot just truly appreciate, grasp and accept the good things He's sent my way.

The second thought that comes my way is the last part of the quote. "GOD would not fail to give him the strength to bear them." This sentence urks me just a bit. Not because it isn't true. I believe it is. But because of how well-intentioned people have used it to console friends who are going thru tough times. I really prefer the way Bethany Hamilton put it when asked why God would allow her arm to be taken by a shark. "God knows what he and I can handle together…" I LOVE IT! It's not about what God is putting me through. Or poor me. Rather, we're a team! God knows what we can do together. God knows I can't do anything without Him. He provides the strength. But not to withstand the heavy burden He's placing on me. It's that He knows what we can do TOGETHER! Not of my strength, but His, if only I am a willing participant in His Story.

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